There was a time when I thought I could do this all by myself. I fumbled and fought and fell down and wondered why I was always struggling. At that time I didn’t believe in a higher power to guide me. I thought I could do it on my own.
I still struggle, and I still fall down. Life is, and always will be, difficult. What has changed is the way I see the fight. I’m no longer in this alone. God is my constant companion. I turn to Him when I am weary, and rest my head on his heart when I can’t see that way to go forward anymore.
I praise Him and sing to Him for all that is good; for love and blessings, for sunshine and shadows, for life and for breath. I thank Him for the exquisite joy of living, for the privilege of walking hand in hand with my Maker as I tackle all of life’s joys and challenges.
There is something different in the way I live my life now, and that difference is trust. I have found that trusting in God gives me the freedom to believe in the possibilities. No matter what happens, I know God is with me, and He has my best interest at heart.
It has taken a very long time to realize I don’t need to be in control; that by trusting in God I can surrender my tightly-held belief that only I can make this life happen the way I want it to.
There are many times when the only thing I can do is trust in God. When I am helpless in my fear or in my inability to see beyond my emotions, I trust in Him to see clearly for me. I know God will never leave me, and His plan for me will take me through the valleys and back up onto the mountaintop.
Trust is something, I have found, that needs to be nurtured one day at a time. It is the nature of the human spirit to want to strive to be in control of our own lives. The true pathway to peace is to relinquish control to God, realizing we really don’t control our own destiny as much as we would like to think we do.
My prayer has been to allow God to work through me to help me become the woman He has meant for me to be. Instead of striving for perfection, or trying on my own to always fight the good fight, I relinquish control of my destiny to the One who held it all along. My future has never felt more sure, even though nothing in life is certain. The constant in my life is the faith I have that God will lead me where He wants me to go.
"'For I know the plans I have for you', says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'" Jeremiah 29:11
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6